


Problems and Piñatas

by PengyChan



Category: Coco (2017)
Genre: Gen, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:55:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,772
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28489395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PengyChan/pseuds/PengyChan
Summary: Dante is on a mission to replace the piñata he destroyed. But he’s not the only alebrije hunting for one.
Comments: 5
Kudos: 14





	Problems and Piñatas

**Author's Note:**

  * For [THybrid21](https://archiveofourown.org/users/THybrid21/gifts).



> A Secret Santa gift for THybrid21, who requested something involving _all_ the alebrijes.

Dante had a PROBLEM.

Normally, whenever he smashed or ate or chewed something, the humans would sigh and shake their heads but that would be it, which told Dante what he had caused was only a problem and not a PROBLEM.

The charred remains of what once was a piñata did, however, represent a PROBLEM. Not that the knocking over of a table and sending a lit candle flying through the air had been intentional, of course, but that didn’t make the piñata any less burned-up. The human who always snuck him food under the table had walked in with it just the previous day, proudly proclaiming she had managed to get the VERY LAST ONE for sale at the market nearby.

_“They’ve sold out everywhere - next year I’ll buy one sooner to make sure we don’t miss out on Las Posadas!”_

Dante was not very good at the thing the humans called ‘math’, but he knew that if that piñata had been the VERY LAST ONE then there wasn’t one anymore and that made the lack of piñata in the household a huge PROBLEM that was also Entirely His Fault.

* * *

Dante whined to himself, kicking more earth over the remains of the VERY LAST piñata to hide it and trying to think of a solution, which was not easy because thinking made his head really ache. But clearly, the only thing that could make up for no piñata was getting another piñata to replace it, and maybe the human had been wrong when she had said it was the VERY LAST ONE.

There had to be at least ANOTHER ONE, maybe at another market or in possession of other humans who could do without one that year. Because Dante knew _his_ family could not. He knew the tall human wanted really badly to break the star-shaped piñata with his daughter for the first time in a very, very long time. So he’d get another one. He had to.

He was a good alebrije, it was _his_ job to fix the PROBLEM he had caused, and so he would. 

Dante snorted some earth off his nostrils, jumped over the ledge, and flew - well, plummeted at reduced speed - down towards the markets.

* * *

Their master had a PROBLEM.

Not that any of them knew exactly what the PROBLEM was. Truth be told it seemed like he had Many Problems ever since the night he hadn’t come back to the Big Place where they used to live, and they eventually found him hiding out in a shack near the water. He had never stopped hiding since, and of course they have stayed in hiding with him even though they were not sure what it was about. 

Clearly things were not going well for him, which meant that as his alebrijes, they were supposed to _do_ something about his PROBLEM, make it go away. But they had always been pets more than spirit guides, and had little knowledge of what _guiding_ someone really meant. Until they figured that bit out and managed to make his PROBLEM go away, they would settle for trying to make him feel better. 

Which they attempted often, with varying degrees of success between the four of them.

There were times when their task was harder than usual, and _this_ was one of them. Until not too long ago, bright lights and loud celebrations across the land meant their master would throw celebrations just as bright and loud in the Big Place, which usually resulted in lots of treats for them as well. But they had never returned to the Big Place, and celebration only seemed to put their master in an even worse mood than usual. 

Currently, he had drunk more of that smelly stuff that came in bottles and he could be charitably described as asleep - more realistically, passed out - on the mattress on the floor of the shack. They usually slept on it with him, but not this time. Today, they were on a Mission to try and help him stop thinking about his PROBLEM that was actually Many Problems they didn’t fully grasp. 

As well as the lights and celebrations, they knew that particular time of the year included gifts - and their master loved gifts. No one had seemed inclined to give him any for a long while, but no matter. 

_They_ were there, and it would have to be enough.

* * *

For a while, it looked like the piñata he had burned really was the VERY LAST ONE. 

Dante had gone through every market within flying range, which admittedly was not a lot because he was not very good at flying yet even though he flapped his new wings very, very enthusiastically. 

Maybe he should have asked the Big Cat to help him out there, but he wasn’t sure where she was and he had little time. He needed to solve the PROBLEM within… well, he had no concept of hours, but definitely within a very short time. 

But _more_ time than that had passed, and he hadn’t seen a single piñata left in any markets, which were beginning to close down for the evening. It was beginning to look like his mission may fail - and what would the humans _say?_ \- when suddenly, he spotted THE VERY LAST ONE. A nice, star-shaped piñata _just_ like the one he had… accidentally incinerated. 

A skeleton was taking it away from the market, so he clearly would have to take it from someone who had already paid for it, which of course was not a Good Boy thing to do. But that was an Emergency and, to be fair, it wasn’t like he would have been able to exchange those pieces of metal and paper for it the way humans did, anyway. 

“What the-- agh! Hey!”

The man yelped, but he wasn’t fast enough to move out of the way. Dante zoomed past him, the piñata firmly in his mouth, soaring up and up, past buildings, right towards--

\-- a window being thrown open. 

SPLAT.

Though splatters of his own saliva, Dente faintly saw a girl covering her mouth and yelping in surprise before he slid down the glass, and fell and fell and fell… right in the water below.

Well, at least this piñata was not on fire. If anything, it was the _opposite_ of on fire. But it would dry up, possibly without need to be on fire, Dante thought as he climbed back to the nearest shore and then up a steep hill. He put the piñata down on the ground, and gave himself a good shake to get himself ready to fly again before he went to pick up the piñata again.

His teeth closed on nothing.

… Weird. The piñata had been there until a second ago.

Dante leaped several feet in the air in his surprise, head swivelling to try and locate the piñata. Oh, _oh,_ did piñata melt in water like sugar skulls did? If that was the case he had such a big, huge PROBLEM he had no idea how he could possibly solve it. One piñata burned to a crisp, one liquified, and only a few hours left before--

“Yip! Yip!”

Dante caught it in the corner of his eye, a flash of lime green barely visible behind the bulk of the piñata it was dragging. He blinked at the vision for a few moments before what he was seeing really began to sink in his brain.

Tiny Alebrije. Piñata. 

The words kind of chased each other in his head for a few moments before they clicked: a Tiny Alebrije was stealing the piñata _._

Oh no. Absolutely not. Dante couldn’t let any alebrije, tiny or otherwise, steal the piñata he had stol-- borrowed for his family. He immediately charged forward, barking; a few leaps were enough to reach the Tiny Aebrije with the Tiny Legs, and he snatched up the piñata. Plus the Tiny Alebrije still attached to it, Tiny Legs kicking uselessly in the air and it refused to let go. 

Dante found itself staring right at its eyes, and tried to bark around the piñata; the Tiny Alebrije let out a growl around the piñata as well. It was muffled, but the message it conveyed - _I’ll eat your face_ \- was still loud and clear.

Under normal circumstances, it may have been enough to intimidate him into letting go, but that was the VERY LAST piñata and the solution to the PROBLEM he had caused, so Dante was Not Letting Go, no matter what--

Furious barking rang out suddenly, and so did a jolt of pain up Dante’s leg, like tiny sharp teeth. He let out a yelp, dropping the piñata in the process, and whipped his head around to see that the pain like tiny sharp teeth was caused by… tiny sharp teeth. The set of tiny sharp teeth was attached to the same Tiny Alebrije who’d been hanging on the piñata and was now hanging on his leg.

… No, wait. The Tiny Alebrije was now trotting away with the piñata, but it was… _also_ hanging onto his leg? That wasn’t right, how could it be in two places at the same ti--

“YIP! YIP!”

As _another_ set of teeth sank in his _other_ leg, Dante howled and jumped straight up in the air, wrigglingly enough to make both sets of tiny teeth come loose. He landed a few paces away, whining, and looked around frantically. Now there were _two_ Tiny Alebrijes dragging away the piñata, and two more standing between them, snarling and yapping to tell him to _go away._

Either Dante was seeing… more than double, or he was severely outnumbered. Given how painfully _real_ those tiny teeth had felt on his back legs, he was _almost_ sure it was the latter. Four Tiny Alebrijes, looking to steal the piñata. That put Dante at a clear disadvantage, regardless of the honestly embarrassing size difference.

Now that was a PROBLEM on top of a PROBLEM.

Dante stood up to full height and barked, trying to lunge for the ones taking away the VERY LAST piñata, hoping to scare them off. It didn’t work: his barking was met with _more_ barking and all four alebrijes threw themselves at him, aiming for his paws with their tiny sharp teeth. 

Dante was probably not a strategic genius, but he knew what his real advantage was and knew he had to make use of it. To be fair, it almost worked: he was able to jump past the Tiny Alebrijes, snatch up the piñata they had left on the ground, and leap again to take flight. 

Unfortunately, the ‘taking flight’ part took a few moments too many and the Tiny Alebrijes were fast, the grip of their jaws tight as a snare on his tail as he frantically flapped his wings to escape. Dante howled in pain, causing the piñata to fall _again,_ and plunged after it the next moment, thought not exactly intentionally _._ The Tiny Alebrijes’ combined weight dangling from his tail was not much, but still _too_ much for Dante to remain airborne, no matter how hard he flapped his wings. 

He _really_ should have asked the Big Cat for assistance.

SPLASH.

The water’s surface closed down over him for the second time in less than five minutes, and Dante didn’t turn out to be a better swimmer now than he was then. It took a lot of thrashing about before he made it closer to shore, because now his back legs and tail were sore and he was unable to find the piñata in the water anymore. 

When he finally spotted it, it was being dragged by the four Tiny Alebrijes back ashore - a good distance ahead of him.

_Oh no. No no no no no._

“WOOF! WOOF!”

Dante barked furiously, paddling through shallow water until his paws touched the muddy ground, and began running towards them at full speed, desperate to catch them before they ran off with his family’s VERY LAST piñata, the solution to the PROBLEM he had caused and… and…

...That beneath his paws didn’t feel like mud anymore. 

It wasn’t often that Dante was hit by a Realization, but this turned out to be one of those times. It helped that the Tiny Alebrijes suddenly stopped dragging the piñata away and ran back towards the water, barking and howling frantically. 

It was not aggressions or intimidation, this time: it was a _warning._ Not the kind that tells you they’re going to eat your face, but the kind in which they tell you _something else_ is about to try and eat your face… plus everything attached to it. 

The thing Dante was standing on, which was Not Mud, was scaly and leathery and shifting. Actually, it was _several_ scaly and leathery things shifting. Through the muddy water he could see a flash of green, some yellow, hues of orange and… teeth. Lots of teeth, which were sharp and decidedly Not Tiny.

Rogue alebrijes.

That really was a big, massive PROBLEM on top of a PROBLEM on top of every other PROBLEM he’d had to deal with that evening.

A yellow eye stared at him, and Dante whined, paralyzed with fear. He _should_ move, even his brain caught on that quickly, but his paws seemed glued right where they were. Which was, as luck would have it, on top of several rogue alebrijes bunched together beneath the water, who also happened to be… _mostly_ crocodiles, plus something else he couldn’t discern but that also looked dangerous.

“YIP! YIP! YIP!”

The frantic barking of the Tiny Alebrijes caused Dante to snap out of it. The four of them were running back into the shallow water, making a _lot_ of noise and splashing up water, occasionally trying to bite into a scaly tail or back or whatever was within the reach of their teeth. 

_Diversion. Run._

Dante leaped forward just a split second before powerful jaws snapped shut where his leg had been, which would have probably hurt a lot more than the tiny teeth he had sampled before. More jaws snapped, the water churning, but the rogue alebrijes seemed taken aback by the confusion and still sluggish; by some miracle Dante managed to make it to the shore in leaps and bounds, without any of those jaws closing around him. 

He came to a stop a couple of leaps away from the water, panting and shaking, and turned back to see the rogue alebrijes were coming out of the water, definitely less sluggish and decidedly ANGRY. The closest one, a crocodile with a tail that was uncomfortably similar to that of those Rattly Snakes, tried to lunge towards him on powerful legs - only to let out a hiss and rear back when three of the four Tiny Alebrijes jumped on its back, yapping and trying without much success to bite through its scales. 

The fourth one suddenly slammed against Dante’s side, barking and snarling. It was the same one that had grabbed the piñata, but rather than _‘I’ll eat your face’,_ the snarl now said _‘move, idiot’._ It was a sound idea, but the other Tiny Alebrijes were still trying to chase off the rogue one and it seemed… a Bad Thing, just flying off and leaving them there. Even if they had tried to steal the piña-- oh! OH! The piñata! Where was--

A sudden yelping noise caused Dante to turn again, just one time to see one of the Tiny Alebrijes land a few feet from him after being hit by a powerful lash of that snake-like tail. It tried to stand, clearly dazed, and Dante steadied it with a nudge of his muzzle before he glanced over to see where the other two were. 

They were backing off now, still barking, while several rogue alebrijes tried lunging towards them and snapping their jaws, _barely_ missing a couple of times. Dante rushed forward, snarling furiously and baring his teeth, hoping to startle them just enough for the Tiny Alebrijes to turn and flee. Just a moment’s hesitation, just a moment would be enough…

The rogue alebrijes froze. All of them.

Dante blinked, his growl ceasing in surprise. He stared at the rogue alebrijes. The rogue alebrijes remained still. Had he… scared them? Was he SCARY? Had he done a Good Job? Oh! This was good, he had done a Good Job! If only the Big Cat could see him now--

_“ROOOAAAAARRRR!!!!!”_

Ah. She _did_ see him now.

Dante tilted up his head to see the Big Cat standing right behind him - towering above him, more accurately - and gave her a toothy grin, tongue lolling as the rogue alebrijes scampered back in the water. The notion it had not been _him_ they had been scared of went well over his head, and his tail thumped on the ground in pride.

_I stopped them, did you see, did you see?_

The look the Big Cat gave him was not precisely impressed, but there wasn’t much time to dwell on that before frantic barking resumed and all four the Tiny Alebrijes threw themselves at the Big Cat, trying to attack her paws. She reared back with a startled noise, clearly wondering what _exactly_ they were trying to achieve. 

Dante immediately threw himself in the way, shaking his head in a way he hoped would convey the fact she was a Friend and not someone whose face they should eat, as the Tiny Alebrije with a few loose screws growled rather insistently. Luckily, they seemed to catch up pretty quickly: in a few moments they paused, stared, and finally sat. They all sat for a while, catching their breath and kind of elaborating all that had happened.

Well. That had been an Adventure, but now sitting there staring at each other was just a tad Awkward, considering that it had started out with the theft of a pi-- oh! The piñata!

Dante immediately jumped back on his paws, looking around frantically for the piñata to fix his PROBLEM. He couldn’t see it and he whined anxiously, turning to look at the Tiny Alebrijes. They seemed to hesitate, looking at each other, then one of them stood and tilted his head to their left, where a log was, and tucked behind it something star-shaped and-- oh! There it was! 

Dante let out a woof and ran to pick it up, showing it to the Big Cat proudly. It was wet and a little worse for wear than it had been when he… _borrowed_ it, one of the star’s arms a little bent, but it was still in one piece and ready to be broken. Dante could see the appeal because it was fun, tearing things apart; only he wasn’t sure why the humans would scold him for it and then go buy something with the purpose of doing exactly the same thing. 

Ah well, he would mull over it another time. Now he had to go back home with it. He gripped it more securely, tail wagging, and turned to look at the Big Cat. She tilted her head, clearly not seeing what a big deal it was, recovering the piñata; then again, she was unaware of the PROBLEM he had caused. Which was kind of the point, so her lack of enthusiasm did not spoil Dante’s mood.

What _did_ spoil it was the realization that the Tiny Alebrijes looked rather dejected, and it occurred to him that they would have to go back with empty paws now… wherever they lived. Dante hadn’t wondered why they had been trying so _very_ hard to get the piñata, but maybe they had his same issue - a PROBLEM to solve, their own human to cheer up.

He really had to get the VERY LAST piñata home, but maybe they could help them find… something else. It wasn’t dark yet, after all. They still had time. 

And with a little lift from the Big Cat, they’d be done in a pinch.

* * *

“Where did you get _that_ from?”

Ernesto stared in utter disbelief at the large basket his alebrijes had somehow managed to drag all the way to their hideout while he was asleep. Or rather less charitably, passed out in a stupor. Either way, he’d just regained consciousness and _that_ was not something he had expected to see when he’d sat up and looked around for a bottle that was not yet empty. Truth be told, he’d briefly wondered if he was hallucinating.

His alebrijes couldn’t answer his question, of course, but they still looked extremely proud of themselves as Ernesto peered into the basket, which turned out to be filled with Buñuelos, Polvorones, Cochinitos, candied nuts and more. A small bounty compared to what used to pile up in his mansion over festivities, but still far more than he’d seen in… a longer time than he wanted to acknowledge. He laughed, a rare occurrence those days, and sat back on the mattress with an armful of sweets. “Hah! Who are good boys and girls? Who are? You are!”

The alebrijes immediately jumped up to lick his face at the praise, and got even more enthusiastic when Ernesto began sharing the prize. 

It was a lot to eat all on his own, after all, and they had earned a treat.

* * *

“What… _happened_ to the piñata?”

“It looks like it’s been dropped from someplace real high.”

“In water.”

“And then dried off in a tumble dryer.”

“Ay, it was that perro, I am sure! Where is he?”

“I saw him taking off with Pepita…”

“Trying to escape punishment, of course.”

“Heh. Like we ever really punish him! He’ll be back for dinner, you’ll see. Well, the piñata is still in one piece, so I guess that’s what matters. Coco, come here! We have a piñata to hit! You should go first!”

“Papá, I don’t _have_ to be the first--”

“Children first!” A huge grin, and her papá held up a blindfold. “Here you go! I’ll help - like we did in 1920, remember? You climbed on my shoulders!”

There was a fond laugh, and Coco entirely gave up on the notion of trying to remind her father she was almost ninety years too old to be, in good conscience, considered a child. The glee that filled her at the idea of hitting a piñata with her papá again _was_ rather childish, after all.

“Of course.” Coco laughed, and took the blindfold. “Of course I remember. And if what I remember about Las Posadas in 1920 is correct, the lot of you may want to get out of striking range...”


End file.
